Millions of people around the world suffer from alcohol addiction. It’s not an uncommon problem.
In fact, five percent of all deaths each year are as a result of abusing the substance. Yet so many of us don’t take the issue seriously.
Alcoholism can be deadly, and many of us could be enabling our loved one’s addiction without even realising. So, if your loved one is a heavy drinker and perhaps need help through residential rehab or a detox, it may be time to start thinking about your behaviour around them and how it may be fuelling the issue.
Naturally, it isn’t the fault of you they are suffering, of which they may not even know themselves, but here are five ways you could be enabling their addiction…
Covering Up for Them
One of the most common ways people enable their partner is by covering up their mishaps. We tend to lie about our partners drinking habits if they have a problem or protect them from consequences of their actions such as not showing up for something.
However, if this is persistently happening, then it’s quite clear there is a problem and by letting them off the hook, you are essentially making it ok.
Financial Support
Finances can often be a problem for those addicted. They may spend hundreds of pounds per month on alcohol, which can often lead to debts and being short elsewhere.
Providing financial support can perpetuate their dependency on alcohol and not take full responsibility for their actions. Instead of bailing them out, encourage them to seek help and support.
Avoiding Confrontation
One of the most common ways we find ourselves enabling is by simply turning a blind eye and avoiding the issue. It makes for a more peaceful life but in the long run it is only going to cause further problems.
It’s inadvertently suggesting that bad behaviour and behaviour influenced by alcohol is acceptable. That could eventually lead to such behaviour becoming more severe.
Rescuing Them from the Consequences of Their Action
While enabling may involve providing excuses, it may also involve rescue missions. That could be calling into work sick for them, picking them up from miles away because they can’t drive or they’ve missed a train or bailing them out of legal trouble.
It is a natural thing to do, help our partner, and you aren’t going to want to see them in trouble, but there are only so many times you can do this before you have to get them to seek help.
Neglecting Self-Care
Finally, we may spend so much time trying to sort out the mess of our loved ones that we don’t have time to look after ourselves. What’s more, you may even develop an “if you can’t beat them, join them” attitude that can lead into a real downward spiral.
By prioritising your own wellbeing you set clear boundaries and a message that you need more. It’s a precedent for them to live by and could be the motivation they need to try and follow suit.
